Nevertheless, my first instinct was to check and see if I had any cash -- which I didn't. So, I passed on by. She wasn't asking for anything, but I felt that I was somehow failing in Christian Compassion by not offering anything. My thoughts went towards all the little luxuries I have concerned my self with lately -- a new phone, planning to buy a new car, some additional books on my wishlist. And then, naturally, I compared those concerns to what this woman's concerns were, and what constituted a little luxury for her. She and I didn't peak in the few seconds we passed, and I thought that perhaps few people speak to her at all. She probably brings up a series of reactions in people -- disgust at her dirt and smell, fear, shame that she will ask for something and I don't want to give it (or can't). And as a result most people probably avoid eye contact and walk on past.
Even though she didn't ask me for anything, perhaps the one luxury I could have given her was simply spekaing with her briefly. A little human contact to acknowledge that she too, is valued. But I didn't. I only thought of it after the fact, and even then I thought, "But what would I say?" I have a good friend who spends a lot of time on the downtown streets. He has come to know most of the local homeless and strikes up conversations with them regularly. I could learn a lot from a guy like this for whom such encounters involve no personal courage at all. Just simple charity. From my time in Africa there was a saying that 'A person becomes a person through other people.' And here, this poor homeless woman gives me a lesson on this week's gospel that no amount of reading books could have driven home any deeper.
Kyrie eleison.
